Thursday, February 11, 2016

The Valentiny Compromise

            Here's my entry for The Valentiny Contest  by Susanna Leonard Hill. You can read all the entries here at Susanna's post for the contest, so, so many wonderful ones!



A Valentiny Compromise

Bear and Bee were enemies,
but both were fond of sweets.
Bee helped create the honey
Bear dearly loved to eat.

(This is a honey of a fable.)

Bee grumped about this crime
that hungry Bear would take
the dripping, nectarous delight
that Bee herself would make.

(No amity available.)

Bee buzzed from bloom to hive,
doing her furtive best
to keep the humming low,
befuddling Bear in his quest.

(Bee was, it seems, unstoppable.)

Still as she frowned and flew,
Bee began to vacillate.
She noticed fresh green leaves  
were all that Bunny ate.

(Bee thought it was remarkable.)

And buzzing Bee saw also
the love Bear had for flowers.
He sniffed among the blooms,
took naps in them for hours.

(Perhaps beliefs are breakable.)


At last Bee understood,
thought it would be a pleasure
for each to take a part
of every garden’s treasure.

(Good thinking made her capable.)

Valentines spread love around
and share sweets all the day.
Smiling Bee proved willing to
give some honey away.

(Show kindness when you’re able.)

Bee buzzed around and round the Bear
sending clues of love that’s sweet,
led hungry Bear to an abandoned hive
for a tasty Valentiny treat.

(Be sure ALL come to your table.)


Linda Baie © All Rights Reserved

14 comments:

  1. Cute, Linda. I love how the lines in parentheses all end with "able"...very clever!

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    1. Thanks, Penny, really a first time writing a story and I enjoyed it. It's not easy, as I know you know!

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  2. This is such a wonderful poem. Was this a contest? I vote for yours. If not, you should send it out. The rhyme and rhythm work so well and I love the parenthetical statements. My students love to do these in their Slices. I will share your poem with them. Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Yes, the link is above, Margaret. I'm so glad you liked it and will share with your students. It was a good challenge.

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  3. A great job if this is your first story. I like the change of heart that bee had and all the comments in parentheses.

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    1. Thank you, and yes, this is the first. It was a lot of fun writing it.

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  4. Linda,
    Kudos to you for writing a sweet Valentine's tale. The rhythm flowed, the rhyme was just right, and you spun a great fable that children will love. Besides all of that the addition of parenthetical phrases provided insight to the author's thoughts. Voice surely rose in this delightful poem.

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    1. Thanks for reading it, Carol, and your lovely comment. It was a new kind of challenge and I'm glad that I gave it a try.

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  5. Really like your format and the "sweet" story, too.

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    1. Thank you! It was fun to try to write something for the contest, and 'sweet' is definitely for Valentines!

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  6. Clever rhyming interjections. Created the cadence of a buzzing bee. Good job!

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  7. What a delightful story/poem, Linda! Love the parenthetical lines and the sweetness of your message :) Thanks so much for joining in the Valentiny fun!

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    1. You're welcome, Susanna. It was lots of fun to write, and thank you for the challenge. From the looks of the entries, you've done a ton of reading this week!

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Having a conversation is a good thing!